Okay. So I don't have days that I feel like that, but I definitely have my moments. Moments when I am busy feeling sorry for myself. Moments when I take my eyes off of God and put them on myself.
Sometimes Dave and I will laugh and reminisce about the good old days. The days where we had 2 incomes and rarely gave spending money a second thought. If we wanted it, we bought it. Weekends spent laying in bed until noon, weekend vacations thought up on the spur of the moment. Good times. But there was a lot that wasn't good too. And looking back, if we are honest, most of those good old days were not so good. We lived for pleasing ourselves, not God.
We wasted a lot of money and a lot of time. So longing for those days is either my sinful flesh or Satan tempting me. It is not something I want!
Nevertheless I have my moments. Just for a second or a minute. A stressful moment when a cigarette might sounds good. Oops! did I just admit that. Yup. I did. See, it might sound good, for a moment, but I certainly know for a fact, without a doubt that it will NOT taste good!
I have to remind myself of this. There is no looking back! You know someone who looked back? Lots wife. Yup. She looked back. And we all know what happened to here. Instead of accepting the grace of Gods provision. she. looked. back. Devastating, is it not?
I can think of many times that God was calling me away-and I didn't accept. Thankfully I didn't turn into a pillar of salt. Grace for grace.
No looking back.
Instead I cling to these verses when I am having a moment.
Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Isaiah 43:18-19
Old things have passed away behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17
But one thing I do; Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. Philippians 4:13
What great promises! I just love that God is doing a new thing in my life, that I am new, and that I have permission from God to forget my past. Because who wants to live there? Not me.