Tuesday, September 22, 2009

life now.

it's been a while since i've paid any attention to my poor blog-there is a reason. i've been busy and kind of feeling sorry for myself. it's been a rough few days.

i thought i was having a bad day, then i read katies blog-it made me laugh, cry, and then laugh some more. it is so comforting to know that i am not in this {motherhood} alone! because earlier today i was feeling like i was. it was a good reminder that this is just a phase, and that this too shall pass. not like that necessarily makes it any easier in the now. it is so hard to die to self, isn't it?!? it is something i struggle with a million times in a day! shouldn't it be getting easier? because it's not. "i just want to do what i want to do when i want to do it!" is that too much to ask? apparently it is. :) for now anyway.
let me start with last week. i just couldn't get caught up on housework. at all. no bother, it is what it is right? yeah. i had a friend {tammy} come over, she has kids, she'd understand, no biggie. until she left, and that's when i found it. a dead bird. in my house! brought in no doubt by one of the cats. but wouldn't you know as i find it, it is that moment when it is in my hands {paper towel of course} and here is one of our mentor moms from MOPs walking up my sidewalk. dead bird in hand. mentor mom. dead bird. ohhhh. i am feeling more and more sorry for myself! i quickly dispose of the bird in the kitchen garbage, remind myself to take it out immediately after she leaves and hope previous company did not spy dead animal on the floor while we were having coffee. i just can't get caught up! and when i do, you wouldn't know it after a few hours have gone by. really. when i was dusting the other day preston got really excited at started yelling "bubbles! bubbles!" i was kind of confused until i noticed that he was chasing all of the dust {ahem , i mean "bubbles"} that were floating in the air.
today started early, really early. like 5:30 am early. maybe that's not early to you, but preston doesn't usually get up until 9-9:45 am. i know i am totally spoiled by that. so i was not prepared for the 5:30am start. i started out in a bad mood and just couldn't shake it. between pulling q-tips out of his nose and telling him to get his head out of the toilet doing 5 nebulizer treatments and having my own agenda i just couldn't shake this bad day. but i am not alone right? and this too shall pass.
there are so many good things though! likes snuggles, hugs, and kisses and zerberts {sp?} hearing my little baby who is getting bigger by the moment call "mama" and sometimes "mom" makes it all worth it. i wouldn't change a thing. it helps to have an amazing husband who takes over kid duty as soon as he walks in the door with pizza in hand. i really do enjoy this time, it is so special, frustrating but special. just seeing him grow before my very eyes, learning constantly. ever changing. growing up. it is a privilege really. God entrusted him to me. what a big responsibility! one that i take seriously!
I know God is growing me. it hurts sometimes. these are just growing pains. i know that God has His agenda too-and it is much better than mine!
Here's the proof:)
blackmail maybe? I am thinking so!
i am not sure what he was thinking or trying to do-i did have the camera on hand coincidentally!
i wonder, are all kids like this or is just mine, or just boys? i am going with the it's a boy thing!





10 comments:

  1. Wow.

    I remember those days.

    You need some stress relief! What works for you? Bubble bath? A book? A walk?

    Do it. Every day. The housework will happen.

    This from a mom whose boys are now men and who used to feel exactly like you describe and worry because the house was never clean.

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  2. What a great post! It does feel better now doesn't it, to get it out, to write it down, to share it. That's what we're here for, to love each other through this stage. :)

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  3. I am in the same boat. And that is all I have to say about that:)

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  4. These are the days...

    It is so great to hear the adventures of other moms!

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  5. i had the blessing of adding two year old twins to my day today...my mom is coming tomorrow, the grocery store, ikea, and laundry were all on the list to accomplish, but guess what? it will most definitely still be there later {and have to wait!}! ;) i am having an 'adventurous' day with four kiddos and it is an eye opener to God's goodness in the provision of energy and strength. because after all, we still end up getting through it, don't we? :)

    p.s. i love that you do 'zerberts'. hehe! so fun! :)

    p.p.s or p.s.s. the 'word verification' down below happens to be "stride". how appropriate is that? ;)

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  6. that is too funny, and i had no idea there was a dead bird in the house! :) even if i had seen it we would have had a good laugh ...

    i can relate on so many levels ... i actually appreciate the fact that you don't fret about getting your house clean before i come over. i wish i could be more like that. i tend to clean like a mad woman before people come and not only is it unnecessary, it can also make people think i'm more on top of things than i really am.

    i always feel very comfortable in your house. :) next time i'll have you over to my house for a change (and i'll try not to clean!). :)

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  7. Glad you didn't notice the bird Tammy! And I'm glad you don't care if my house is a mess when you come over:)

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  8. I hear ya x4. =) I seriously got so tired of my boys getting into everything in the pantry and closets and bathrooms that I now have locks on like every door in my house. It's pretty comical to people who come over that I seriously dig out a key just so they can use my guest bathroom, but it saves my sanity for now. ;)
    Love the q-tips up his nose by the way, lol.

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  9. I haven't been able to visit your blog for a bit...but I am so glad I did today! These are the LONGEST days with preschoolers, unfortunately they add up to the SHORTEST years. (Said one wise MOPS mentor mom!)

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